My approach: humanistic integrative psychotherapy

I have a diploma in "humanistic integrative" psychotherapy. These are really two separate terms in themselves. This is how I have been trained and how I have been taught to be a particular kind of psychotherapist. It might be helpful for them to be explained as they are not phrases that are used every day.

What "humanistic" means

The humanistic therapeutic approach stems from the premise that you the client are the expert on you. And provided with the right conditions such as really being listened to and not being judged, you will be able in time to find your way forward. My role as your therapist is not to diagnose you but to pay close attention to your sense of what matters and facilitate self-discovery and positive changes in your life.

What "integrative" means

The integrative part means that when I trained to be a psychotherapist, I didn't just learn about one particular theorist, I have learned about many different theorists and their theories. This means I can draw on different ways of working with my clients depending on what is happening in their life or what they might need in that moment in time. For example, there is not a one size fits all process in psychotherapy, it is a very personal and nuanced experience. Integrative practice lets the work bend towards you, instead of asking you to fit a method. You can read more about my training and qualifications if you would like the detail.

Why the relationship does the work

Most of what makes therapy effective is the relationship itself between the therapist and the client. For a lot of people it might be a very new experience to sit down with someone whose attention is undivided, who is not waiting for a turn to speak and who has nothing invested in you reaching a particular conclusion. That can feel strange and might even feel uncomfortable at first, but it can also be the thing that finally makes it possible for you to hear yourself.

Looking at where patterns began

A great many of the ways we handle difficulty were learned early and most of them made good sense at the time. For example, a child who keeps the peace in a volatile house is doing something sensible. The same instinct thirty years later in a relationship where nothing is at stake, might mean never saying what you want. We look at where those habits came from, not to apportion blame to anyone, but because seeing a pattern clearly is usually what makes it possible to choose to do something else.

What the work looks like week to week

We meet at the same time each week, which matters more than it might sound. A predictable slot makes it easier to pick up a difficult thread you left hanging. However session times can be more flexible if needed. Some weeks arrive with something specific and urgent. Others begin with nothing much and end up somewhere neither of us expected. Over time the patterns we have been discussing start to show up in the room as well as in the stories, and that tends to be where the useful work happens.

How long any of this takes varies enormously, we agree the shape of it together and revisit it as we go.